Hi guys! How are you all doing?

I decided to make a short post today because I kinda need something to uplift my mood from all the worries I've been having lately. My last Life lately post was way back May 2018 and it's literally months before I finally obliged myself to make another post. 

As you can see, I have not made a post last month because I could not find any motivation aside from water color painting. And all the activities I did seemed to be more related on my other blog which is by the way: iheartpsychology which is a blog on random things about my interest in Psychology. 

I spent the last three months attending seminars on Psychology and mental health and reading and "reviewing" my psychology subjects for the licensure exam but unfortunately, I changed my mind (I am like this, I always change my mind). I stopped reviewing for the licensure exam instead I focused myself on the upcoming Comprehensive examination that we have at the graduate school to qualify for the Thesis Writing subject which was the last requirement I have to complete so I can finally finish my Master's degree and graduate. I spent my time preparing my requirements and going back and forth to our university to check my application for the examination. But up until now, there is no update yet if I could take the exams or not. So, this is actually my first worry. 

I wanted and I ought to take the exam this semester or else I have to re-take most of the subjects I already completed because I will be charged with penalty and over-staying. In preparation for the exam, of course I have to reread my notes and review. And that's my second worry. Would I pass the exam with the way I am reviewing? Because I cannot concentrate on reviewing at home since there are a lot of distractions and chores to do. I spent lesser time each day reading and reviewing, My mind seemed to be not on the mood for memorizing, analyzing and all that. I only have 2 weeks to go before the exam and I honestly read only 2 pages as of today. Could I pass the exams? Huhu!

Then, the fact that I am sick. The reason why I quit my job and why I am spending my time at home with my parents. My third worry. I wanted to be cured. I have been taking my meds for exactly a year now. But unfortunately, we went to an examination today and the result says I am still sick. 

I don't know how to feel right now. So I was really looking for something to caught my attention (so I open my blog and here I am) rather than feeling down because of the results. It's just that I felt suffocated that I still have to spend more time at home doing things that are necessary for daily living but would not help me achieve the things I wanted to do. I also felt tired of all the arguments my parents have been doing every day, it sucks. I know it's just normal with parents to shout over petty problems but I am the kind of person who can't stand too much noise. I felt irritated and tired of them. And their arguments and complains with one another just ruin my mood to concentrate and study. They are the best distractions I have. You might suggest why don't I study outside instead. I can do that but I don't want to spend money. So, it's a no for now. And money is my fourth worry too. I have too little savings left. And I need a job to earn money. But because I am sick I couldn't look for work.

These things kept me from sleeping lately so I thought I have to let go of my thoughts and write them down. I know worrying is not good, but I am a worrier. I am so stressed right now. Thankfully I have watched a few videos of Lavendaire and that kinda uplift my spirit. I just realized that at whatever point in my life I am right now, I am on my track. Maybe God is leading me into something that is not on my plan because He has better plans for me. 

Maybe I should not worry too much but instead I have to trust in His plans for me. I may not be healed right now but it is not the end of the world and I am not dying yet so why should I feel down?

Maybe this time I have to do it better. Be really concern with my health and discipline myself to a healthier lifestyle. Drink more water and exercise regularly. I have to start and be consistent. 

Instead of focusing on my worries I should be focusing on positive things that happened lately. By the way, I was spending time doing my small business. I am selling homemade ice cream in jars to my relatives and friends. And I have been receiving positive feedback from them. I should be focusing more time on marketing my product so I could earn more.  I enjoyed mixing different flavors and tasting ice cream. I made the label by myself. I also made an improvised waterproof sticker at first and finally I have it printed on vinyl for mass production. I am so happy because I made the sticker layout on Photoscape my favorite photo editor. I love how the label turned out. 

Then, I am also grateful that I finally had the complete list of my graduate school grades. I have requested this last 2015 but the registrar said that my professor did not encoded my grades yet. Finally, I saw my grades and I am so happy that I successfully pass all the subjects. 

I am also feeling positive after seeing my friends and workmates. It made me remember all good memories we have at work. I am happy I earned new friends like them while at work. I so missed working and listening to their stories made me jealous but at the same time I am happy for their progress. I just wished we could see each other more often as friends not me as their boss. 

Looking back at these pictures made me smile. Maybe I just need a butterfly hug right now! Do not worry too much! So for all readers who are experiencing negative vibes right now I suggest we just focus our thoughts on positive things. I am living you with a message below. 

"Bad things are going to happen, that's not negotiable. What is, is how you deal with it."

(Dr. Beck, To the Bone)